Statuses

It seems that I am a bit of a grumpy-wumpus today.  I am exhausted, and everything from the tips of my spiked hair to the ends of my toes seems to hurt. Maybe it’s this nasty rain we’re having, or this crazy weather where it’s winter one day and summer the next. My joints are throbbing and my head hurts, and if I thought it would do me any good at all to go to bed right now, I would. But laying down hurts worst of all, and besides, my stupid, middle-aged-woman’s bladder would have me back up in an hour anyway.

Thanks for letting me whine.  You may now resume your regularly-scheduled, pleasant evening. That is all.

I have a childhood friend whose birthday is today.  As childhood relationships often do, this one faded as we moved through adulthood. There never was a falling out, but it just sort of went away.

This person was the Maid of Honor at my wedding. I can’t look at my wedding album without seeing photos of her everywhere, and it makes me sad. When her mother died last year I would have wanted to be there, but she would not talk to me when I called.

And this day, her birthday, is the hardest. Because 11 years ago, when faced with choosing a date for my elective C-section, I chose this day as the day that my son was to be born. Now her birthday has a permanent place of honor in my family.

I know some relationships are best let go. And I have tried for many years to let go of this one. But, I am sad, and I miss my friend. I can tell you the last time I saw her, when I ran into her by accident in the mall parking lot, when I had just found out I was pregnant with my son. Sadly, she has never met the boy with whom I honored her, by having him on her birthday.

So, Happy Birthday, Beth, wherever you are and whatever you may be doing today. I hope 2013 is a great year for you. This day will always be a happy one for me, because of my son. So, in a way, thank you for that. And, I just want to say that I miss you.

The blog is finally starting to look and behave the way I want it to. It’s been a long week. But it’s getting there! I’d love to know what you think of this new format.

You might have noticed that I haven’t updated this blog since July of last year. I’m kinda sad about that! But what I realized is this. I’m now doing a lot of different things in my online life, and I have expanded beyond the typical blog. With the advent of Facebook and other means of sharing my online self, I find myself enjoying the immediacy of quick, little blurbs, or a quick photo, or whatever. So, as my new blog format emerges, hopefully it will become conducive to various types of communication, and allow me to update more frequently.

Here’s the thing, though. It might take me a while to get it where I want to be. And also? I might talk about more than just knitting… which has become something of an embarrassment to me lately. But, that’s the subject of another post for another day. I promise. Hang in there with me…. I’m coming back.