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Remembering

I have a childhood friend whose birthday is today.  As childhood relationships often do, this one faded as we moved through adulthood. There never was a falling out, but it just sort of went away.

This person was the Maid of Honor at my wedding. I can’t look at my wedding album without seeing photos of her everywhere, and it makes me sad. When her mother died last year I would have wanted to be there, but she would not talk to me when I called.

And this day, her birthday, is the hardest. Because 11 years ago, when faced with choosing a date for my elective C-section, I chose this day as the day that my son was to be born. Now her birthday has a permanent place of honor in my family.

I know some relationships are best let go. And I have tried for many years to let go of this one. But, I am sad, and I miss my friend. I can tell you the last time I saw her, when I ran into her by accident in the mall parking lot, when I had just found out I was pregnant with my son. Sadly, she has never met the boy with whom I honored her, by having him on her birthday.

So, Happy Birthday, Beth, wherever you are and whatever you may be doing today. I hope 2013 is a great year for you. This day will always be a happy one for me, because of my son. So, in a way, thank you for that. And, I just want to say that I miss you.

2 responses to “Remembering”

  1. Marty Avatar

    I have a friend like that. Our friendship went into adulthood and only ended about 5 years ago when we had a falling out at work. Since, even though we don’t live too far from each other, we only talk if we run into each other and every time I try to extend the olive branch by inviting her to coffee or lunch I get no answer. Still makes me very sad.

  2. Leslie Avatar
    Leslie

    Hugs! I’ve lost two of the best friends of my life that way — just growing away, moving away, having different experiences, feeling guilty for the distance… I remember Anne every May Day (her birthday) and Roberta every August 22 (she & my father shared the day). Life is always changing, so I guess friendships must too. It still sux though.

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